Where it sits
Slay is never lukewarm. It sits at the top of the praise scale.
Tell it apart
| Aspect | Slay | Ate |
|---|---|---|
| Grammar | Verb, also an exclamation | Past-tense verb |
| Mainstream since | 2010s | 2020s |
| Common extension | "Slay queen" | "Ate and left no crumbs" |
Both come out of ballroom culture and both mean you did brilliantly. Slay is the established word; ate is newer and, for many speakers, the stronger compliment.
What it doesn't mean
Its slang sense comes from Black, Latino and queer ballroom culture of the 1970s and 80s, decades before Gen Z.
What it really means
Slay has had a long career. In Old English it meant to kill, in the old, serious way: enemies, dragons. By the 1920s, Dictionary.com notes, "you slay me" meant "you make me laugh till it hurts". Its third life, the one most people know now, began on the floor of the drag ball.
In the Black, Latino and queer ballroom culture of the 1970s and 80s, Dictionary.com explains, to slay was to compete and win so completely that no one could challenge you: a flawless outfit, perfect hair and make-up, sharp movement, attitude. It's the same logic as "killing it", taken to its fullest.
The word travelled outward in stages. The documentary Paris Is Burning put ballroom vocabulary on cinema screens in 1991. From 2009, RuPaul's Drag Race gave it what Dictionary.com calls a massive signal boost. In 2016 Beyoncé brought it fully into the mainstream.
That last stage brings mixed feelings. Dictionary.com notes that some people see the word's mainstream adoption as appropriation rather than celebration, a familiar pattern for words from Black and queer speech. You can still use it freely, and it's worth knowing whose word it was first.
Where it comes from
Old English, to kill
The same logic as "killing it": to defeat a performance so completely that nothing is left standing.
- Old English
Means to kill, used of battlefield enemies and mythical beasts (Dictionary.com).
- 1920s
"You slay me" means "you make me laugh hard" (Dictionary.com).
- 1970s–80s
In Black, Latino and queer ball culture, "slaying" means a flawless outfit, look or performance (Dictionary.com).
- 1991
Featured prominently in Paris Is Burning, the documentary about New York's drag balls (Dictionary.com).
- 2009 onwards
RuPaul's Drag Race gives it a major signal boost (Dictionary.com).
- 2016
Beyoncé brings it further into the mainstream (Dictionary.com).
In real life
- Text: "just saw the photos from the wedding, you slayed"
- Text: "your presentation slayed, the boss loved it"
- Text: "new haircut?? slay"
Questions
Q01What does slay mean in slang?
To do something brilliantly or look amazing. "You slayed" is a big compliment, and "slay" on its own works as an exclamation of approval.
Q02Where does slay come from?
The word is Old English for "to kill". Its slang sense, according to Dictionary.com, comes from Black, Latino and queer ball culture in the 1970s–80s, where slaying meant a flawless look or performance. Paris Is Burning, RuPaul's Drag Race and Beyoncé carried it into the mainstream.
Q03Is it OK for anyone to say slay?
It's used widely now. Dictionary.com notes that some see its mainstream spread as appropriation rather than celebration, so it's worth knowing and acknowledging where it comes from.
Q04What does "slay queen" mean?
It's praise for someone who looks or performs amazingly, a cheer more than a description.