01 · Side by side

Side by side

Comparison sheet
AspectSelf-careSelf-indulgence
PurposeTo continueItself
OrientationCollectivePrivate
Lorde's word for itWarfareWhat she denied
SellableNot originallyHighly
02 · Which one you meant

Which one did you mean?

In shortReaders who land here meaning Self-Care rather than Self-indulgence are usually searching for phrases like “what is self care”, “audre lorde self care quote”, “is self care selfish”.

Self-Care

  • “what is self care”
  • “audre lorde self care quote”
  • “is self care selfish”
  • “self care vs self indulgence”
03 · The mix-up

Where the confusion comes from

The mix-up“Self-care is a modern wellness concept — bath products, spa days, treating yourself.”
What's true

The formulation that put the phrase into popular circulation is explicitly a war metaphor, written by a Black lesbian poet living with cancer that had spread to her liver: self-preservation as an act of political warfare. Her sentence begins by denying exactly the reading the wellness industry adopted — 'not self-indulgence'. Scholarly work frames the concept as intertwined with community organising and treats today's commodified version as a contradiction of the original rather than an evolution of it.

04 · Read either one

Read either one in full